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Dear Amy,
One logical reason you might see other people enjoying the things you've been trying to manifest is simply because you are focused on those things, so you notice them whenever they come up. At the same time, however, your jealousy speaks volumes about the probable roots of your manifesting frustration, for if you begrudge someone else something, you will indeed keep yourself from similar blessings.
People basically react in one of two ways when they hear about others' good fortune: they either feel jealous, like it's not fair that someone else has what they want and they don't, or they feel encouraged, because if other people can manifest those things, that means they probably can too.
Our habitual reaction to others' happiness greatly impacts our ability to manifest what we want in our lives. If we smile upon others' blessings, we will tend to be great at manifesting for a couple of reasons: First, what we send out to the Universe (including what we wish for other people) is what we get back. Second, how we FEEL when we focus on what we desire determines our power to attract it.
You see, what we think and feel on a regular basis is what we are practicing to experience in the future. If we focus on money with a happy feeling, we metaphysically align with happy prosperity. If we focus on money with a feeling of jealousy or frustration, it will be hard to manifest what we want, and even if we do, we'll still feel dissatisfied.
Many of us learn our habitual response from the family we grew up in, but what's more important is who we are on a soul level. We're all born with various strengths and weaknesses based on our past life experiences. As a result, some people seem to have an innate understanding of the law of attraction, for they've mastered this in other lives. These spiritually evolved folks also tend to have a high vibration, so it's easy for them to create what they want.
Since what we wish for others is what we get ourselves, one of the most powerful things we can do to initiate a manifesting breakthrough is to wish everyone else the fulfillment we desire. For folks who already feel like life is unfair to them, this can be really challenging, but that also means that overcoming that challenge will make a really big difference.
For example, if you can't seem to find true love no matter what you do, ask yourself how you feel around people who are in love. Do you feel annoyed or jealous because they have what you want? If so, try to shift your perspective, and instead of feeling jealous, look at that love around you as a sign that you are in the process of manifesting love yourself.
It may be in someone else's experience now, but if it's close enough for you to notice it, it must be moving into your world! Further, instead of feeling resentful because your ex has manifested happiness in love again, take it as evidence that you can do the same thing. You can apply this line of reasoning to every sort of situation in which someone else is manifesting something you want.
In addition to viewing these developments as positive signs, you'll want to evaluate what you are sending out to the Universe in the form of what you wish for other people. In particular, look for any relationships or situations where you begrudge someone else some blessing.
For example, if thinking about how your ex-husband is engaged leaves you feeling jealous, you are begrudging him new love. This won't dent his happiness, but it will keep you from creating the same. (It may help to know that he wouldn't object to you falling in love again - otherwise, he could never have manifested that blessing himself.)
To evaluate your power as a conscious creator of prosperity, you might ask yourself a couple of key questions: When you want more money, do you focus first on how you might earn more, or on how you wish someone (like your ex-husband) would give you more of theirs? Do you give to others in kind, or are you something of a taker? Are you conscientious about paying your bills on time?
Visualizing lots of money won't do you much good if at the same time you aren't giving to others what you want to receive yourself. So if you don't pay your debts in full and on time, you are depriving others (whether it's a person or a business doesn't matter) of their due.
I once knew a woman who was always struggling financially, and because she had so much fear about money, she did all sorts of things that kept her in lack. For example, she's the sort of person who would buy a fancy dress, tuck the tags inside, wear it to a party and then try to return the dress to the store.
In fact, she often experienced buyer's remorse, and would get in arguments with store clerks when she tried to return merchandise that the store couldn't resell because she'd used it. She seemed to believe that the store owed her something simply for being more successful than she was. She doesn't understand that whenever we try to get back more than we put in, we eventually end up with the short end of the deal.
To break through this sort of block, all we have to do is practice the golden rule. In her case, she'd have to treat the store as she'd want to be treated if she were the owner.
Also, when we do the wrong thing to someone else to fulfill our own desires, we just end up hurting ourselves. This is more than karma, for we start to feel bad about ourselves, and on a deep (perhaps unconscious) level, we may believe we don't deserve the happiness we long for or expect to be punished in some way.
By contrast, when we stretch ourselves to do the right thing by others even though we're afraid for ourselves, we set ourselves up for success, and end up believing that we deserve the best from life. If instead of hoping others will give us more than we give them, we are generous and try to give more than we receive, do more than we are paid to do, show others more courtesy and respect than they show us, and love even more than we are loved, we'll naturally manifest an abundance of blessings.
So to turn things around, I recommend you just start giving to others what you desire for yourself. As the world's happiest, most successful people have discovered, the key to success is not getting others to give us what we want, but rather, helping other people get what they want. If you shift your approach, I'm sure you'll turn your manifesting results around too. --Julia
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