Dear Julia,

I've really been working on myself for the last couple of years in terms of personal development, prosperity consciousness, business success, spiritual growth, etc., and I now find that I have no tolerance for B.S. I find it frustrating to be around people who refuse to crack a book, move forward with their lives, or do something progressive instead of just repeating the same situations over and over again. That said, I also know that everybody is on an individual path and there are reasons people stay broke, ignorant, selfish, etc. Still, it's a tough balance for me to allow while knowing there are other options for people. What do you do about people like this? There are also a lot of people in my life who lean on me like a walking cane. I guess I appear to be more competent and balanced than they are. I'm wondering how you (with your skills) deal with such people.

-D.

Dear D.,

We have a lot in common, for I've been struggling with these issues for a couple of decades now. After you've been walking a conscious spiritual path for many years, it becomes the only way you know how to be. It's then easy to forget what it was like before you became devoted to self-improvement, which can make it hard to relate to all the folks in the world who are just trying to get through each day with as much pleasure and as least pain as possible. You can share with them all sorts of enlightening ideas, but if they're not ready to embrace them, you'll drive yourself crazy if you're attached to what happens after you cast your pearls of wisdom out there.

In terms of the law of attraction, I see two separate forces at work in situations like this. First, your lack of tolerance for B.S. is common in people who are adept at the law of attraction, for you are ever raising the bar on what you desire and expect from life. I must point out, however, that freaking out about B.S. is also B.S. After all, once you achieve this level of spiritual development and know that you can create whatever you want, it makes no sense to keep creating B.S. and then getting upset about it. When B.S. rears its ugly head, it's time to examine your own vibration and lift yourself into a higher level of experience.

By allowing yourself to get annoyed and irritated, you're hurting yourself: your own vibration is suffering and you are setting yourself up to manifest more frustrating experiences. (Remember - what you focus upon expands!) Instead of wishing other people were more like you, you're wise to look for something to appreciate in them and assume the best in every situation. When you're able to stay in pure positive energy even when others are leaning on you or bumbling along, the quality of your experiences will change, and you'll begin to attract more happy, successful people.

In order to deal with B.S. or the potential frustration of watching people repeat the same limiting, self-destructive problems over and over again, and NOT have it lower our vibration, we have to rise above ego. When we're centered in our higher selves, there is nothing to get upset, angry or frustrated about; instead, there is calm faith that all is well and everyone is doing just what they need to be doing in order to learn whatever they need to learn at that time.

It is much easier to achieve this higher perspective when we're dealing with people we don't have close personal relationships with. In fact, the more important someone is to us emotionally, the more attached we will feel to them making the decisions that we think they should make in order to feel the way we think they should feel.

When you start getting upset about others' habits and choices, it's a sign that your ego is getting attached to a certain outcome again. As this is a test of your faith, it's time to ask yourself if you truly believe that everyone is just where they need to be and doing what they need to be doing.

Second, the brighter your light becomes, the more people will be attracted to it, and the greater your life grows, the more people will take notice and want to emulate you. It is thus entirely natural for people who really have their acts together to attract all sorts of hangers on. It's easy to see how this is true of successful business owners like yourself; the owner creates a thriving business, and in doing so, he creates jobs for people who don't have the personal power and ambition to create something similar for themselves.

This too is natural: not everyone can be the business owner or there would be no employees; not everyone can be the shepherd or there would be no flock; not everyone can be the teacher or there would be no students. Everyone is doing what suits them given their present level of development.

Further, all of this is relative, and everyone has both strong and weak suits. When we are feeling irritated or critical of others, we are wise to stop focusing on their problems and realize that our own flaws are begging for attention. Just as you may look down on someone as hopelessly blind to their own issues, someone else may view you similarly. (I feel for our poor spirit guides; if they had egos like we do, I'm sure they'd have given up on us a long time ago.) Also, the people who struggle with some of the stuff that we find easy may have some beautiful traits that we have yet to develop, so we are wise to remain humble and look for the Divine in everyone we meet.

Speaking of humility, I must warn you that it is daring and foolish to tell ourselves (and the Universe) that we can handle anything because we've got our acts together, for this sends out a signal just begging for a greater challenge. The bigger our egos swell, the more likely we become of bumping into something sharp and ending up in an embarrassed, rubbery mess on the floor. (Trust me - I know this one really well!)

Finally, when I'm struggling with this sort of situation, the thing that helps me the most is gratitude. I am profoundly grateful for knowing what I know and being able to do what I do, so it is my pleasure to share what I've learned with others. I strive to live by the truth that we get what we give, and I believe that of those to whom much is given, much is expected. With the power to consciously create what we want in our lives comes a lot of responsibility.

We may end up feeling like we give out and put up with more than our fair share, but if you think about it, it's not really true. In fact, our lives are for the most part relatively wonderful and stress-free. Since we are so richly blessed, we can afford to generously and patiently guide the kindred spirits coming up the metaphysical trail behind us.

That said, please know that you are not required to help or save anyone. I believe that doing so will bless you in countless ways, but not if you end up feeling frustrated, drained and taken advantage of. We are wise to do what we feel called to do as long as it feels good to us, but as soon as our vibration starts to sink, it's time to surrender the results, get recentered in faith, and focus on whatever makes our own spirits soar.